Life is nothing if not surprising. We can be cruising along happily immersed in our routines, and then out of nowhere – BAM! Life takes a dramatic twist. A dream-job might suddenly pop up, or a loved one might get very sick. Life’s curveballs knock us off-balance and demand our immediate attention, often causing great stress.
Over this past year, our family has had several traumatic, life-changing curveballs thrown at us. Through this raw and challenging time, I’ve found ways to cope, recharge, and make it through each day. I have also learned a lot. Not every day is easy, but the following tips have made this year’s rough journey more manageable. They also work whether your curveball is winning the lottery, or losing someone you love.
9 Tips for Dealing with Life’s Curveballs
1. Take Time for Family. Just be together! Routine is comforting, but when it’s disrupted with a stressful situation, it becomes even more important to protect your time with family. Eat together, check in on each other, or try cooking together.
2. Reassess Your Priorities. What is truly important at this time? Can you let anything go that is causing you extra stress? Give yourself space, by rescheduling, postponing, or cancelling work projects, commitments, or extracurriculars.
3. Surround Yourself with Supportive People. Last Spring, one of life’s curveballs meant my three teen daughters needed me much more than they had in a long time. It was time-sensitive and critical that I was attending appointments with them, and there for them to lean on. I was their “support person” – which meant some of my other priorities had to wait.
Everyone in my life was understanding and did their best to support us… except one. I was surprised and disappointed when someone I thought of as a friend was unsympathetic and cold towards me. Honestly, there had been previous signs of this behaviour, which I chose to ignore. This showed me I should have listened to my intuition. Letting go of some things will free you to do better things.
4. Eat Healthy. When stress takes away your appetite, or you are exhausted, it can be hard to make food a priority. Even if the food isn’t “fancy”, eating a good balance of protein, fruits, and veggies can help you feel much better. When you can’t stomach a full meal, try eating small portions more often. Also choose nutrient-dense foods, like nuts, cheese, and prepared fruits or vegetables with hummus.
5. Take a Vacation. Step away from the rush of daily life, and take a break. Whether it is a weeklong holiday, a weekend trip, or a staycation, give yourself permission to escape the stress and relax.
6. Wind Down Before Bed. Give yourself time to wind down each night before bed, to create a relaxing space between the busy day and the sleep you need. Read, watch tv, meditate, or listen to music to get your mind off of “all of the things.”
7. Get Plenty of Sleep. Life’s curveballs are tiring! So much mental energy is needed to sift through the things you are dealing with. For me, seven to nine hours of sleep is ideal. I go to bed at the same time most nights, and wake up a couple minutes before my alarm each day. I think this is a good sign that I’m getting enough sleep. Listen to your body! If you are tired, go to bed half an hour earlier.
8. Talk About It. When faced with an unexpected or traumatic situation, it can be hard to understand your own feelings, let alone share them. Still, try talking to a friend, family member, others also affected by the situation, or a professional. By “getting it out”, you take some of the pressure off of yourself – and it reaffirms that you aren’t alone.
9. Exercise. Thank goodness for exercise! During these stressful times, especially in the Spring, exercise was a very real challenge. But when I did a workout I felt less stressed afterward, so I did my best to exercise even when I didn’t feel like it.
I got thrown yet another curveball recently, and it still has a good hold on me. Last week, I forced myself to go out with my running group. Despite having a hard time holding back my tears, I felt better after the run. Yes, I have missed workouts during recently, and I have to work to be okay with that (which is hard for me to do!). I need to show myself kindness, and take care of myself. Sometimes that means talking myself into working out, and sometimes that means having a nap instead.
If you aren’t up to doing a full workout, try these Pilates exercises you can do anywhere.
Life’s curveballs reinforce how important it is to show ourselves grace, and also take care of ourselves the best we can. Eat well, rest, move your body, nurture healthy relationships, and make time for fun. It is a lesson in balance, one that even I am still working on.