Give Yourself Some Credit

The words we tell ourselves matter. They creep into our subconscious minds and set up shop, affecting all the other thoughts and actions we have. If you let the good thoughts in, more good will follow; but if you max out on picking out what’s wrong, things become harder. Do you pick out your flaws? Maybe you don’t even notice yourself doing it. I do it, and I see others doing it, too. 

We Are So Critical

Sure, we all have things we’d like to change about ourselves for one reason or another, but hyper-focusing on the things we don’t like isn’t helpful. I hear people being hard on themselves for their shape, weight, wrinkles, stretch marks, weaknesses, job performance, that they can’t sing, or are “terrible” at math. 

Another way we bring ourselves down is by allowing the things that “go wrong” during the day to consume our minds, even if it is totally out of our control. Maybe you stubbed your toe and had to take an evening off dance class, or it rained on the day of your picnic. Yes, these things are disappointing, but they don’t need to be a catastrophe. 

Some of us are better than others at letting things roll off our backs, something that I’m still working on, but it is possible to work on your mindset. 

Why bother? 

When you take time to notice your wins, you’ll start to notice more of them. It feels good! And since everything in your day has the potential to affect the rest of the day, it’s in your best interest to keep things moving smoothly. If you feel stressed and angry all day about something that happened in the morning, your energy may be low, you may not focus well at work, or snap at people you didn’t mean to. It’s time to focus on your wins instead.  

What are Wins? 

Wins are things that you accomplished that day that deserve celebrating. They don’t have to be big milestones and are going to be different for each of us. If you are going through a tough time, your win might be that you brushed your teeth that day. A new mom’s win may be that she napped when the baby napped. Maybe one of your twelve seedlings survived the heatwave. Even the worst day ever will have one tiny win if you look for it. 

Things I hear People Say

There are a lot of measurements and numbers in the fitness and sports world, and it can be easy to use those to gauge success. Reps, weight (lifted, gained, or lost), distance, time, etc. Our self-criticism doesn’t stop there, however. Here are examples of things I’ve heard clients say that made me feel a bit sad: 

“I’m going to do the easy version today. I’m so out of shape!” Hmmm compared to who or what? From my perspective, she is in great shape, though not where she was three years ago. But she’s working on it! 

“I’m a weak lump that sits at my desk all day.” This person has a desk job like many others, and also manages two offices, drives her sons to sports, does the grocery shopping, and did Pilates twice that week. 

“I’m not active enough; I just swim.” Five days a week of swimming sounds like a lot to me!

I wonder what would change for these people if they started focusing on what they were accomplishing, rather than what they weren’t? 

Stop Downplaying Your Achievements

We tend to forget how hard we’ve worked for something or how far we’ve come from when we first started. I know that when I started doing teacher training for new Pilates instructors, I was reminded of how I was once in their shoes and how much knowledge I have now. 

Here are some phrases and words to try and eliminate from your self-talk: 

• “I should _____” be better, be faster, do these things, etc.
• “I’m just/only _____” I’ve talked about this before, and you are not just anything.
• “ I don’t _____ enough… work out enough, eat greens enough, lift enough, etc.

Let’s embrace celebrating the good stuff that happens during the day, so you can be proud of what you’ve done and be ready for the next day with positivity in mind. What can you celebrate, even on a less-than-ideal day? Not every run will be at your best pace, but you did it. Celebrate that you put your runners on, even if you didn’t go do your workout. Celebrate that you did an exercise that you never thought you could do. Wins can be driving to the gym and going in for 5 minutes, or that you completed 1km of a run you intended to be 5km. One is better than none! 

Wins can be found everywhere. I encourage you to look at your day or week and find some wins to write down or share. You’ll be surprised at all you’ve accomplished.